Profound Thoughts

[bilby]

The whole basis of religion is that it's about how our souls control our lives.

Sorry, I will read that again:

The whole basis of religion is that it's about how arseholes control our lives.

 

[ideologyhunter]

Vhen I vas little girl in Poland, ve all had ponies. My sister had pony. My cousin had pony. So vhat's wrong vith that?

 

[TV and credit cards]

Vhen I vas little girl in Poland, ve all had ponies. My sister had pony. My cousin had pony. So vhat's wrong vith that?

Nothing. Thinking you were once a little girl in Poland, that may be something that needs to be addressed.

 

[mudlark]

Trying to get all the groceries into the house in a single load is both lazy and ambitious.

 

[Gospel]

When you empty your vacuum cleaner, you become the vacuum cleaner.

 

[Elixir]

Trying to get all the groceries into the house in a single load is both lazy and ambitious.

Lazy if anything gets dropped, ambitious if you fully succeed. Life is a gamble, and we all lose in the end.

 

[ideologyhunter]

The trick is to start eating the best stuff as you leave the store. Definitely get the Famous Amos started. Then continue in the car. Less unpacking at home.

 

[TV and credit cards]

The trick is to start eating the best stuff as you leave the store. Definitely get the Famous Amos started. Then continue in the car. Less unpacking at home.

And he drove right past the house.

 

[Gospel]

A punctuation mark can make the world of difference:

Great Britain’s Queen is dead.
Great! Britain’s Queen is dead.

 

[bilby]

A punctuation mark can make the world of difference:

Great Britain’s Queen is dead.
Great! Britain’s Queen is dead.

Only Freddie Mercury is actually dead, though, no matter how you feel about it. John Deacon has pretty much retired from music, but Brian May and Roger Taylor both still perform occasionally.

 

[pood]

A punctuation mark can make the world of difference:

Great Britain’s Queen is dead.
Great! Britain’s Queen is dead.

Only Freddie Mercury is actually dead, though, no matter how you feel about it. John Deacon has pretty much retired from music, but Brian May and Roger Taylor both still perform occasionally.

Saw Bohemian Rhapsody last night. Full of factual errors no doubt done for dramatic purposes but great acting and gawd the music.

 

[Politesse]

No need to ask me how I feel about a Freddie Mercury biography that bungles the question of his sexuality.

But, you can't make a good biopic until someone their whole "estate" is dead.

 

[thebeave]

The trick is to start eating the best stuff as you leave the store. Definitely get the Famous Amos started. Then continue in the car. Less unpacking at home.

I can relate. Unfortunately, I tend to shop at the end of the day when I'm tired and hungry. I buy a big bag of tortilla chips and salsa and casually start munching on the chips on the 15 minute drive home. By the time I get home, the bag is mostly empty and the salsa jar has yet to be opened. Then I scratch my head and ask, "What just happened here?".

 

[Politesse]

This is why I get a sandwich at the deli and then do the rest of the shopping.

 

[SLD]

God must be a fart. He only speaks through assholes.

 

[Gospel]

The bad news about walking into a bathroom when someone is mid-dump is the smell. The good news? I can fart and walk away guilt-free.

 

[WAB]

Philomena Cunk:

"If gravity is real, how come it doesn't work on kites?"

 

[SLD]

Only a woman who has gone through childbirth without an epidural can understand the pain a man has to endure when he has a cold.